


The Bond of the Universe

by Dysha



Series: The Bond of the Universe [1]
Category: Emmerdale, robron
Genre: AU, Assisted Suicide, Death, Self Harm, Soul mate, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-16
Updated: 2017-07-20
Packaged: 2018-11-01 15:03:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 17,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10924296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dysha/pseuds/Dysha
Summary: Happiness, the feeling of being in love, the feeling of being proud, anger, sadness, pain. All the feelings that comes with being a human, is not just yours and yours alone, not When a bond has connected.For most people with The Bond it was  either physical or emotional.sometimes in rare cases, both physical things and emotional things are shared.





	1. Robert, car fumes

**Author's Note:**

> Robert hasn't returned to Emmerdale. He's still Robert so he gets beat up alot.
> 
> I guess Lachlan does not really exists in This, he's not mentioned anyways.
> 
> I might have f'ed up the time Line, But I tried, and I hope it still works.

It had started six years ago.

At first he hadn't thought much about it, surdenly not thought that it was  _it_ that was happening.

 

That Day he had felt fine at first, then he became tired, really tired.

He had looked in the bathroom mirror and he Saw that he was pale, his Lips blue.

He started to cough.

He tried to get himself to bed But dizziness tolk over and he fell to the bathroom floor.

 

From then on he could feel occational Waves of sadness,disspare, pain. He ignorer it But that's how it started.

 

As the years went by the waves of happiness overcame him more often, it was maybe more like a Whiff of Happy that happened once every couple of months. It never lastes long and it wasn't much. It was more than in the beginning, Where the pain almost became unbeareble at times.

 

He found someone to love, he got engaged.  ~~~~This is Where he should be.

He Got married.

Him and his Wife never talked about it. He tried to hide it But she knew and they left it like that. 

 

It was a rare thing.

Why try and find a person who carried so much pain, When he was Happy here with the life he made for himself.

The Universe might not agree and may not have planned for it to be ignored But he was fine with being married, being a stepdad, being successfull and he was fine with being with someone he shared No, rare, cosmic  Bond with. He was fine being Robert.

 

......

 

Six years ago he sat in a car, the garage locked, the engine on.

He woke in hospital, dissapionted at still being alive. Angry and sad about still having to carry so much pain.

Not fine with being Aaron.


	2. Aaron, beaten up

He had returned to the garage to work for the first time since it happened.

If he felt anything he pushed it aside, he didn't want to feel anything, he just wanted to work.

 

The it happened. The first time he experienced it, even though he wasn't Aware of What it was.

He stood beside a car he was working on, When all of a sudden he felt like the Wind had been knocked out of him.

Cain had rushed over to him, worried about it being some sort of aftermath from 'the incident'. Worried that his Nephew had returned too soon to the garage.

\- I'm fine Cain.

Cain gave him a look that told Aaron, that he didn't believe him But Cain didn't want to push any further.

 

The pain and discomfort in his stomachwas still there When he sent to bed.

 

The next Day When he woke, he struggled to get out of bed. His stomach and his ribs Where sore.

When he finally Got Down to the kitchen Paddy was making breakfast.

 

Paddy had heart Aaron comming Down the stairs, he turned around and was shocked by the appearence of the Young boy.

\- Lad you alright?

-Yeah, I'm fine Paddy.

\- Doesn't look like it. Maybe we should get you to a doctor.. it could be sidenaffects from...

\- No. Leave it!

\- It could be.. Maybe it was too soon for you to start working Again and..

Paddy was interruptus by Aaron:

\- The car didn't punch me in the gut Paddy.

\- What?

\- That's how it feeds.. I don't know why okay.

 

Paddy knew or he had an idea of What it could be.

 

Paddy had managed to get Aaron to sit Down to eat his breakfast with him, and Paddy told him the little he know about 'the bond'.

Aaron didn't want anyone to know, he had enough on as it was, and he didn't need more attention. It was all fairytales and Lies, that was What Aaron thought about it.

Aaron made Paddy promise that he wouldn't say anything to Chas and not to mention it ever Again.

Paddy promised But told Aaron that they both needed to talk about it, if anything Else happened and Paddy told Aaron to do some research. Aaron had refused to listen and Got to work.


	3. Robert, crash

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lawrence and Chrissie White are okay People in This fic

For a while he had felt almost nothing from the Bond, relief maybe and something similar to love But not quite. Other than that it had been quiet. 

Robert know that the Bond must have felt the beating he sent through, his bussiness scam hadn't went how he had thought. 

 

Then it felt like he couldn't breath. His heart felt like it had been ripped in two and stopped beating. He felt Panic, unbelieveble  Panic.

Robert knew it had to be  _that_ person, the Bond, because never had dinner caused him to feel Panic like that.

 

After the Panic at dinner, the pain and Panic never really ledt But it did shrink in size.

 

Whatever and WhenEver he felt anything from the Bond, emotional and physical, he tried to hide it, even when he was alone. It had become pure reflex.

 

A couple of months after the pain, Panic, the heartbreak returned, it was like it had doubled in size and was accompanied with unbeareble sorrow and guilt. The guilt for Robert was hard to handle.

Robert was having lunch with his wWine, Chrissie and his father in law, Lawrence.

He was trying his hardest to hide it. He had felt uneasy and on edge all Day, But no physical pain.

That's When it hit him Harder than ever before. He couldn't hide it any longer, he couldn't control himself anymore.

 

He screamed with a heartwrenching Sound. 

He pushed himself away from the table and out of the chair. He hunched Down on his knees, his forehead resting on the cold floor.

He cried like he had never cried before and he couldn't stop it. 

 

Chrissie and Lawrence had rushed to Robert's side, they Where shocked and had No idea What to do.

 

Lawrence hadn't know for sure. He had had his suspicions. He never mentioned it to Chrissie. But seeing Robert like This there was No doubt in Lawrence's mind What was actually happening. Robert had a Bond.

 

They had moved Robert to the sofa When he had calmed Down a little.

 

Chrissie was the first one to break the silende.

\- What happened?

\- Don't.

Robert managed to Whisper.

Chrissie had moved closer to Robert and was sitting on the edge of the table in front of Robert.

\- Please.. Robert, le me see.

-What?

Robert couldn't say anything Else, and he found it hard to look at chrissie. He was embaressed that they had seen him like that.

\- Let me see the damage. We both know how it Can manifest and leave bruises or worse. .. I've seen Them on you before.

-Chrissie..

Lawrence Said, his Voice low and carefull.

\- Not now dad.

She Said and turned her head to look at Robert.

\- You can't... you can't see Them.

\- Robert love, I'm fine with it, like i Said, i've seen Them be...

chrissie was interrupted by Robert, his Voice No longer a whisper.

\- No I mean, there's nothing to see.

Lawrence shook his head and Met his daughters eyes, they both knew What they had seen and it hadn't looked Pleasant.

 

Chrissie moved a little closer to Robert, her hands on his knees.

\- Robert we all Saw how you... we all saw it and we have to check to see the damage.

 

Lawrence had moved to stand next to Chrissie.

\- Robert.. it looked violent.

Lawrence Said.

Robert responded, hos Voice yet Again in a Whisper, a weak whisper.

\- It wasn't that kind of pain.

Chrissie let out a startled gasp and Lawrence sat Down next to Chrissie on the small table.

\- I thought it was only physical. You mean you Can feel....

Chrissie was interrupted by Robert.

\- Everything.

 

They all knew it was rare. Not many had 'The Bond Of Two', a complete Bond. Not much had been written about it, so researching it would be quite a task. 

 

They sat in silence for What seemed like a life time.

\- We have to find This person.

Chrissie Said, surprising both Lawrence and Robert.

\- No Chrissie ! I have you, I dont want whoever the person is.

Lawrence was about to say something But he didnt get the chance, chrissie had realisere something.

\- Could it be a man?

Lawrence let out a breathy Laugh.

robert looked a chrissie.

\- Dont be daft.

\- Im not, you know I'm not.

Robert nodded his head, he knew she was right, it could be a man.

Chrissie continued

\- I mean from What i have observed so far, This person gets hurt a lot.. As in fighting.

\- I know.

Robert Said.

\- a man?

Lawrence blurted out.

\- Dont you get started!

Robert snarled at his father in law and continued

\- maybe it is a man, But it dont want it, him.. i love you chrissie and from What I Can feel, there isnt much joy in This other persons life. It doesnt matter if It's a man or a woman, i dont want that, I want to feel Happy here, with you.

Both chrissie and lawrence could hear the genuine thruth in Roberts words.

 

\- Can we please forget about This and move on? 

\- This cant be ignored Robert.

Lawrence Said with a Stern Voice.

\- You can't just completely ignorere it, you have a Bond, you cant pretend other vise, espesially 'the Bond of two'.

\- then we find out, we reasearch how to deal with it, how to live with it.

Chrissie replied.

 Robert grabbed her hands.

\- Thank you.

 

 

**Aaron, crash.**

 

Aaron's World had collapsed and then it had been completely destroyed.

 

He know now, that it wasnt with Jackson he Shared a Bond. 

Jackson felt nothing, not even the dirt that would soon be Above him.

The despair, pain and guilt he was feeling, was his own.


	4. Aaron and Paddy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> scars and self-harm is mentioned.

A couple of months had passed since Jackson's death.

Paddy had tried to get Aaron to talk about it and the guilt he learly felt.

Aaron was more closed off than usual that was a cause of concern to Paddy and it frightened him.

 

Paddy had also tried to get Aaron to talk about what he had seen after Aaron's suicide attempt. 

Paddy had tried to get Aaron to talk about it even before Jackson's accident and death. Aaron had snapped at Paddy everytime and left.

 

Paddy had told Aaron that now he was spending more time with Chas and was half living at the Pub with her, that they should tell her about 'The Beating Inciden', The Bond.

That had made Aaron even more closed off, so Paddy had kept quiet about everything, untill he had a plan.

 

..

 

Paddy had read up on The Bond, gathered information. 

He knew a little about it and he had known enough to see what was happening to Aaron. But he didn't know more than the absolute minimum of the basics.

If Paddy was going to have a chance to get Aaron to sit down for a talk, to listen, he had to be prepared. Other previous attemps had failed and Aaron yet again storming out.

No, PAddy was not letting that happen again. He was determined, therefore prepared.

They  _had_ to talk about it, maube if he succeeded, Aaron would open up about Jackson aswell.

 

Aaron walked through the door to the kitchen, head down and a blank expression on his face.

 

\- "Sit." Paddy commanded gently.

 

Aaron looked at Paddy, frown on his face. He didn't like to being told what to do.

 

\- "I've been online... Researchin."

Aron knew right away what Paddy was talking about. He didn't want this, so he made a turn towards the door.

Paddy had seen the first signs of Aaron doing a runner even before he had opened his mouth.

He  _had_ to continue, he  _had_ to stand his ground. Paddy had to say something fast, before Aaron had made his way outside.

 

\- "It's just physical right?" Paddy took a breath and hurriedly continued:

\- "I saw you, remember, shen it looked like you'd been through a beating."

Aaron was close to the door now, his hand on the handle. Breathing fast and angry breaths.

 

\- "Not all get bruises you know."

Paddy had his eyes on the table but looked up when he had heard Aaron stopping himself opening the door.

Paddy continued to look at the young man.

\- "Some do and it can get pretty intense, as you may have found out, and painfull."  
He was still looking at Aaron, who had removed his hand from the door handle. Aaron was still standing like he was ready to leave at any second.

 

Paddy had papers printed out, layed infront of him on the table.

He looked down at the m again.

 

\- "When.. when did it start? when was the last time you felt something?

Aaron grunted and looked out the window of the door.

 

\- "Sometimes people don't feel everything and well that's a good thing I would say.. If the one you have a Bond with, that's what it's called.."

\- I'm not completely daft Patrick."

PAddy continued:

\- "well, it's good not feeling everything, if the one you have a bond with get's beaten up alot or... if you haven't felt anything for a while, maybe the lad haven't been in any trouble since the last time.. Good, very good thing."

 

There was almost an eerie silence but Paddy took Aaron not leaving as a good sign and that his new tactic had worked. He also knew that, that could change in an instance.

 

\- "I feel content."

Paddy looked confused, both by the word Aaron had used, but also surprised that he had answered him at all. Paddy gave Aaron time to continue, he could see that Aaron wanted to say more. While waiting, it hit him, what Aaron said, what he felt, that was an emotiong, not something physical.

 

\- "But it's like .. It's like not really me feeling it." Aaron said with doubt lacing his words.

Paddy's mouth was slightly open and he was staring at Aaron.

\- "What Paddy?" Aaron snapped.

 

\- "You feel both?"

\- "Both what?... whatever. This whole thing is stupid."

Aaron had his hand on the door handle once again.

 

\- "No... It's not... so, you feel..."

\- "Everything." The young man answered, his voice just above a whisper.

\- "But I don't want to okay! I want it to go away." Aaron's voice back to angry.

\- "You can't make it go away just like that. And if it's a complete bond, 'the Bond of two', I don't think you can get rid."

\- "A what?"

\- That's when you can feel the physical and the emotional.. That's what you have and it's rare Aaron.. Makes more reason for you, for us to do some reading about it.

 

Aaron hadn't moved from his spot infront of the door but his hand was still ready to open the door.

 

\- "But I do know, that ignoreing it completely, try to push it away.. Fighting it, it can make you ill Aaron... Please just stay here a little and listen."

Paddy was practially begging Aaron, eyes pleading , hoping Aaron would do the right thing.

 

Aaron walked slowly towards the table where Paddy was sitting. He moved the chair from underneath the table, making sure to be as noisy as possible. He sat down a little meter away from the table.

Aaron was ready to leave, Paddy knew that.

 

\- "Okay.." Paddy said, breaking the silence.

\- "I found some stuff.. I mainly focused on the physical form for Bond... 'cos I thought.."

Aaron shifted on the chair.

\- "I did read up a little on the emotional one aswell."

Paddy fumbled with the Papers and post its infront of him.

\- "Uhm... it's called a single Bond if you have either an emotional bond or the physical Bond.."

Aaron rolled his eyes at the word emotional.

\- "What you have is a complete bond. Like I said before, it's rare, so I haven't found much about it and didn't really look, because I didn't think that..."

\- "Well.. then read up on both."

Paddy let out a breath.

\- "you can't just mash the information together and woops you have the info on the complete bond, doesn't work like that."

Aaron huffed and moved to sit further towards the edge of the chair.

\- "It's more intense than a single bond."

Aaron looked to the ceiling, he had planned on ignoring it, hoping it would go away.

\- "Rare.. No one here in this village have had any kind of bond with anyone. Never met anyone.. and no one talks about it. This is stupid, daft."

 

Paddy leaned further to the table, looking at Aaron.

\- "True, no one here has ever had a bond of any kind, and that's why it's not talked about. but it does exists, here and other places around the world. No one can denie that.

\- "Why me Paddy? I have enough on my plate."

\- "I know.. I think you should just embrace it."

Aaron let out a little ' Are you kidding me laugh'.

\- "But that's why I think, at least, you should try and understand it better, i'll be there with you every step of the way.

Aaron wrinkled is nose.

\- "Soft lad." And he sat back in the chair, no longer on the edge of it

 

They sat there in the kitchen, Paddy reading and Aaron skimming the papers.

\- "When was the last time you felt anything?"

\- "Uhm, yesterday I guess."

\- "A punch?"

\- "No!.. I don't know.. shame maybe."

Paddy tilted his head slightly to one side.

\- "It wasn't my shame Paddy."

\- "Okay, okay."

\- "So what now?"

\- "hmm, you sure you don't want to find the bloke?

Aaron got to his feet fast.

\- "No, no way!"

\- "Calm down.. it's what's supposed to happen anyway.. remember what you have just read Aaron."

\- "How. How would that work. the person could live in a different country for all I care."  
\- "Aaron. what did we just read? when you want to find the other person you will and If the other person wants to find you aswell, it becomes easier. And when it's time it will happen natureally. I don't know how it really works I couldn't figure that out by reading all this.. you?"

\- "No."

 

Aaron was pacing the floor of the kitchen.

\- "I can't Pads.. Jackson just di..."

\- I know son, I know. We'll deal with what we have so far.. okay?"

\- "Okay."

 

..

After their first sit down, Aaron was more okay with Paddy mentioning the bond and things he's read about it. Although it was all quickly mentioned in the morning rush. Aaron would say he was busy, he had to go to work and couldn't be late. Paddy knew that Aaron was listening.

 

Aaron didn't feel much from the other person, nothing major.

There was the occational feeling of having a black eye, a split lip, but it wasn't, luckily, all the time, and it didn't leave any marks.

 

Aaron would sometimes feel a pang of guilt, shame, anger, resentment.

Feelings he knew all to well. They felt different from when he felt them himself.

Rejection was the worst one, the other person felt it from time to time, and quite frequent, and the feeling of being lost aswell.

 

Love wasn't a feeling he got from the other person that much,not all the time, sometimes yes and Aaron did like when that would happen.

 

..

One morning after a night where he had found his razor, he was sitting in the backroom of the pub.

Aaron was living there now.

Paddy walked in, about to come up with an excuse as to why he was there, but Aaron spoke first.

\- "So the other person... can feel everything aswell? I mean we both have to have.. the complete bond, right?"

Paddy sat down across from Aaron.

It was the first time Aaron had initiated the talk himself.

\- "Yes, you both have a complete bond.. why?"

\- "Just wondering."

 

Aaron's mind wandered to the way he had found himself dealing with things, that if he could feel the razor, the other one could aswell. He wondered if the feeling of it was the same for that person, as it was to him.

\- "aaron?" Paddy said concerned, he could see that Aaron wasn't reallu there.

\- "Well... I better be going."

...

No one but Paddy knew about Aaron's bond, he didn't need anyone else knowing about it. He still didn't want it.

Instead people found out about something else about Aaron.

.

Chas had found him sitting on the bed, his shirt zipped open.

Then she saw the cuts.

 

 

 


	5. Robert and Delta

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Robert going through what Aaron felt in chapter 4: Aaron and Paddy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> selfharm mentions.

Chrissie and him still didn't talk much about it, sometimes they did.

They knew that they couldn't ignore Robert's bond.

Robert couldn't and shouldn't ignore it, it could make him ill.

 

.

Later they did talk about it a little more than in the begnning, it was mostly about what they had found out while researching, findng answers.

They searched for information on how to live with it and how to live with it when not wanting to meet the other person. They didn't find many answers, having a complete bond, or 'the bond of two', proved to be difficult, and complicated.

 

Chrissie suggested to Robert that he should try and find the other person. Robert would have none of that. 

Lawrence suggested it aswell and they had ended up yelling at eachother. They weren't eachothers biggest fans, they tolerated eachother. Lawrence did believe when Robert said that he loved Chrissie, and Robert did.

 

.

Robert didn't feel much from the other person.

Sometimes he could feel the build up of varies emotions, but then he would feel a sharpness going through him and then he would feel numb.

Sometimes he would feel that sharpness on his arms and he would look but nothing could be seen.

He hadn't figured out what it was yet.

 

.

Chrissie had found a specialist online and had arranged for them to meet her in London.

Lawrence wanted to ome aswell, Robert didn't like the idea of Lawrence being there, but he didn't say anything.

Lawrence _had_ helped when Robert had had that complete meltdown.

Luckily nothing like that had happened since.

 

...

They went to London. All three of them.

Robert had felt concerningly numb two days prior the London visit and he was still feeling numb.

He didn't like it. 

He would catch himself worrying a little about the other person, but only a little. Then he would shake it off.

 

They were at a tiny house in London, a house that time seemingly had forgotten.

They were sitting in a dark room, only light source was an old chandelier dangling above the round table were they where sitting.

 

She was a woman in her mid sixties maybe, long grey wavey hair, grey eyes and a slender body.

She was a beautifull woman.

Delta she called herself.

 

Delta talked them through what they could expet from todays visit. It was mainly talking, getting the basics right of what kind of bond, and the basics about that bond. She said that being open and honest was important.

 

While Delta was talking, Robert began to feel a weird sensation on his stomach and his sides.

It was that sharp feeling again.

Robert's thoughts about the sensation was interupted by Delta, who had tried to get his attention and on her fourth try of calling his name, he had reacted.

 

\- "What are you feeling Robert?" Her voice gentle, soothing and calming.

Robert looked to her.

\- "I don't know... I mean, it's hard to explain. I don't know what it is."

\- "Is it an emotion?" Delta's voice still gentle.

\- "Chrissie told me that you can feel both the physical and the emotional... Do you know what that is called Robert?"

Robert nodded.

\- "Complete Bond, or for the sentimental people ' The bond of two'.

Delta smiled.

\- "Correct.. And what are you experiening now?"

\- "An emotion I think.. But I can feel something on my stomach and sides aswell.. I have felt like this, on and of, for a while now... But I don't know what it is." Robert tried to explain, using his semi business vioce but failed slightly at that.

 

\- "What's the feeling?"

\- "I feel numb, lost at the same time but also relaxed. It doesn't make sense does it?"

Robert said, eyes on Delta. 

He hadn't forgotten that Chrissie ad Lwrence was there but he found it esier to focus on Delta.

 

_ "Can you still focus on me and what I say?"

\- "Yes, it's not too bad."

Delta was about to say something but Chrissie interupted her with er question.

\- "I told you about what happened, right?"

\- "Yes, you did." Delta answered and turned to look at Robert again.

\- "The day Chrissie is talking about, is it similar to what you are feeling now?"

Robert let out a laugh.

\- "No, not at all.. _this_ is nothing."

\- "Was that, that day, the worst you have experienced?"

Robert thought about it.

-"Yes, no.. maybe."

Lawrence huffed a laugh.

\- "Come on Robert, you have to say more than that!"

Robert shot Lawrence an angry look-

\- "Well switch place with me and tell me how easy it is!"

\- "Robert!" Chrissie said, not liking when he raised his voice at her father.

\- Please, all of you, shouting won't help anything. Rushing Robert won't help either... It can be onfusing to understand what is going on, especially if the emotions or sensations are unknown to Robert... and please.." Delta said and looked at Chrissie and Lawrence.

\- "No interruptions." Her eyes fixed on Lawrence.

Delta looked bak at Robert.

\- "Can you continue?"

 

He had just me Delta but he already liked her, her reprimanting Chrissie _and_ Lawrence like that, made him like her even more.

Robert never really trusted anyone he had just met but he trusted her, not a 100% but close to. She _was_ still getting paid alot for this session.

 

Robert let out a breath looked at Chrissie and with a deep intake of air he turned to look at Delta.

\- "The first time was bad... I.. It felt like I was dying or maybe was dead at some point."

Delta looked concerned and Chrissie gasped. 

Chrissie hadn't knwown about that, Robert never mentioned it.

Lawrence sat quietly in his Chair, trying his hardest not to give away any indications of how worried that actually made him.

 

\- "Do you want to talk more about it?"

\- "No." Robert's answer cam quick.

\- I am going to ask you again... Would you like to find the other person?"

\- "No, I don't want to do that. I'm with Chrissie, my life is with her." Robert said matter of factly.

Both Chrissie and Lawrence smiled at that. Delta didn't.

\- "You know that, that goes against everything that the bond holds?"

Robert didn't say anything, hardly reacted.

\- "With the type of bond you have, you could easily locate the other person, if you wanted to... Well not ompletely, but you can get a sense of where the person is located.... and if the other person is searching aswell it'll be easier. If you are both searching for eachother, you will know."

\- "How?" Lawrence asked sharply.

\- "I don't know exactly but it is something the two people will just know. It is different for people with 'the bond of two'."

\- "If you don't even know, then why should we listen to you? Maybe we should go to someone else." Again Lawrence's words came out harsh. He hated waisting money.

Delta smiled.

\- "I lived next to my bond, so I never needed to search for her. We had a single bond, emotional."

Robert smiled at what Delta said, but he shook it off fast.

\- "No.. I want to know how we can live with this. I know I can't make it go away.. I want to be able to control it somewhat, be able to function like a normal person again." Robert looked at Lawrence.

\- "And no, we won't be going to someone else." Robert said in such a tone that Lawrence didn't dare to argue with him.

 

\- "I don't reccomend it. I find the bond to be something special, something to embrace...."

\- "How can he embrace that pain and bruices he's been having!" Chrissie said upset.

Delta didn't look at her, she only looked at Robert and continued what she was saying.

\- "If someone has that kind of connection, they should think themselves lucky.. And you Robert, you are very lucky to have this special, rare Bond with someone."

\- "I don't  feel lucky.. I have Chrissie, I need no one else." Robert said, almost convincing himself that he never cheated on Chrissie.

\- "Okay." Delta said, clearly not happy about Robert's choice.

 

Delta talked about different strategies, but not in depth, she said that they should meet again, and she would go in to more details then. How Robert could manage it easie, but stressed thatwith a complete bond it was more difficult and control was a fleeding thing. She mentioned that it was important that Robert talked about what he was experiencing when he felt something from the other person.

 

Robert tried to focuse on everything that was being said, every question Lawrence and Chrissie asked.

He could feel his focus drifting.

He could feel his own breathing change. He tried to hide it.

 

Shame and sadness came rushing over him, like a tzunami. His breathing was fast now.

Again he hadn't noticed that the room had gone quiet.

Robert was lost in the emotions of another person.

Then Delta's voice broke through.

\- "Robert... Tell me what you are going through right now."

\- "Pain... Shame, guilt... It's okay now.. It's going away again."

Robert lifted his head and looked into Delta's grey eyes.

 

The feelings had dissapeared. Robert was just about to say something, when he felt something on his stomach and he flinched at the sensation... PAin, it was pain, that sharp pain again.

Robert's mind was racing: 'How can someone feel relaxed while this kind of pain in there?' He still didn't understand what it was.

 

All of them tried to get him to explain what he had felt but Robert didn't want to talk anymore. His walls slowly but steadily coming up.

Somehow, Delta knew that and told them all, that it was enough for today and that they should call her later, so they could find a date for the next session.

 

Before Robert reached the door, Delta whispered in his ear.

\- "Come alone next time. You need to be yourself if you want to do this."

She left and disapeared into another room, and Robert was left confused by her words.

He followed Chrissie and Lawrence out the door, while thinking: 'Be myself.. I am." He knew though, that it wasn't intirely true.

 

.

Delta was standing by a window, peaking through the curtains. Watching all three of them leave.

She _knew_  ,that this bond Robert had, was very strong.

 


	6. Robert, bruises and Ed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The start is continued directly from where the previous chapter ended, but then jumps in time/gives a little overview about what happens over time.
> 
> I hope it makes sense :)

When they had returned home, they arrived as they had left Delta, in silence.

 

Robert excused himself, saying he was talked out and went straight to the office, hoping that neither Lawrence or Chrissie would follow him. They didn't.

 

He sat in his office chair.

Delta hadn't said much, well she hadn't explained much.

'Next session' Robert mumbled to himself.

He wasn't even sure that he wanted another session.

He liked Delta, there was something about her. Robert had to admit that he was curious about her and what she would have to say, if they were to meet again.

 

Robert felt a little sting from his stomach.

It was the same place where the sharp sensation had been.

 

He walked over to Chrissie's side of the office.

Chrissie had a mirror hanging on the wall behind her desk.

Robert stood infron of the mirror.

He took his suit jacket off and lifted his shirt.

His eyes went wide and for a couple of seconds he forgot to breath.

 

He was covered in bruises.

It had never been this bad. These lingered. The other ones had dissapeared within seconds of him discovering them.

Chrissie didn't know about all of the time he had had marks on him.

 

Robert stood in front of the mirror, staring.

The didn't feel like bruises.

'What's happening?' he asked quietly to the empty office.

 

Robert heard the door creek and let his shirt fall to place, threw on his jaket and walked away from the mirror.

 

\- "You okay love?" Chrissie asked and walked over to where Robert was standing.

\- "Yes, I'm fine. Don't worry.... Just thinking about the bussiness."

\- "The bussiness?" Chrissie asked raising an eyebrow.

\- "The salons or my father's bussiness?" She saud while smiling.

\- "Chrissie..."

\- "Sorry, so about the bussiness?"

\- "I should do more, make more of an efford, show what I can do."

\- "My father already knows what you can do, that's why he hired you."

Robert laughed quietly in his head, sometimes she was so naive.

\- "mmh, well.. I want to do more."

\- "This isn't just a way to try and avoid what's going on is it? A distraction?"

\- "...No. Maybe.. or both."

\- "When we go see that woman again, we...."

\- "No! I don't want to see her again."

\- "Are you sure? .. hmm, she did seem very adamant that you should meet this other person, which I have to admit, I didn't like... and you're right, you shouldn't meet the person or Delta if you don't want to."

Chrissie cupped his face with her hands.

\- "She didn't seem that proffesional to me."  
Robert nodded, he didn't know if it was in agreement or what it was, it just seemed to fit.

 

..

Robert burried himself in work, made sure that he was always busy.

Chrissie worried at first. Her thoughts were that Robert was trying to ignore the bond and she knew that that would be a bad thing.

He got headaches and was at times very pale.

"Talk to me, please Robert, you can't ignore it" she had said, pleading.

Robert found out that, by giving her the smallest of details about what he was feeling from the other person, that his headaches and discomfort would dissapear and that he could manage it that way.

He hated talking about it but this way everyone was happy and he could continue his life as he did before but he was a more successfull bussiness man now.

Who needed Delta , some expert who hadn't told him anything.

 

..

From time to time the sharp sensation would repear, but with no marks visible. If there were marks, they would dissapear the moment he saw them.

 

The sharp feeling was long apart and then almost stopped at some point.

So mostly, it was relatively quiet on the Bond front.

..

 

One evening he was having dinner with Lawrence and Chrissie.

Lawrene was yapping away about a bussiness deal and Chrissie prentended to pay attention.

Larence's words were directed at Robert.

 

\- "Darling you alright?"

Robert looked up, he could feel his cheeks flush even more and his heart beating rappidly.

\- "You look a bit red." Lawrence said with a raised eyebrow.

\- "Mh, fine." Robert really didn't want to go in to details about this one.

\- "Come on, talk. If it's about the bond, I'm fine with it, you know that. And it does help." Chrissie tried.

\- "it's nothing, don't want to talk about it." Robert's words came fast and hurried.

\- "Robert!..." Lawrence's voice loud and irritated but he didn't get the chance to finish what he wanted to say before Robert blurted out:

\- "I'm in love!" Robert quickly regretted it and saw the confusion on their faces and he corrected himself.

\- "He... _He's_ in love. I think."

\- "Oh... How lovely." Chrissie said while smiling.

\- "You do look like a giddy school boy." Lawrence laughed.

Robert scowled at him at first but then he couldn't help but smile, being in love was a nice feeling.

Robert could sense that it was in the early stages, where everything was a little unsure but good.

Robert was happy for him, his Bond.

 


	7. Aaron and Robert, searching

Aaron was slumped on his bed, his head spinning with tiredness and thoughts.

Thoughts about Adam, Cain, the fire and Ed asking him to come to France with him.

Aaron didn't know What to do with it all. 

Luckily the Bond had been relatively quiet, No beatings and only short burets of anger.

 

Aaron was tired and desperatel needed to sleep.

.

Robert was laying in his and Chrissie's bed.

He was alone, Chrissie had gone to visit her sister.

Robert had had a long Day with phonecalls and meetings, starting at the break of dawn.

It was late When he had finally grotten home.

Robert had immediately headed to bed, not bothering to shower.

He had quickly removed his clothes, except For his boxers.

 

He needed sleep.

 

..

Their eyes were closed and they were on the edge of sleep.

No control over their thoughts and Body.

They were soaring above the Clouds, quiet and peacefull, White cotton like shapes below Them.

 

Suddenly they started to descend in a fast pace through the layers of different shaped clouds.

They didn't feel scared.

It was a Nice feeling, a drop like that, should be the cause of fear, But for Them it was peacefull and a form of freedom.

 

The Fall had slowed Down and they were still now, surrounded by Yellow, orange, blue and purple colours, Bright, vibrant and warm.

It was like stranding in the middel of a sunrise.

..

Robert breathed in a familiar scent.

He couldn't remember Where he had come across it before, But he knew that it wasn't a scent which was present in the House he shared with Chrissie.

.

Aaron breathed in an unfamiliar scent.

He wiggled his nose and he knew, that it wasn't from his room at the woolpack, or from the woolpack at all.

..

The sunrise they were standing in, was slowly disappearing and replaced with something else.

..

Aaron's vision was Blurry, he could see that he was surrounded by White. White Walls, White interior. He was in a House.

.

Robert Saw patterned wallpaper, he couldn't see the details of it, or other details of the room he was in. Everything  was in a Blur.

..

Suddenly both of Them took a deep and Panic felt intake of air.

\- "No!" They both yelled at the same time and eventhough they were miles apart, they swore that they could hear the echo of another voice.

 

..

Aaron was sure of What to do now. He called Ed.

.

Robert knew What he had to do. He called Delta.

 

..


	8. Robert, Delta and goodbye.

Robert was standing infront of the House he's been in once before.

He felt welcomed there, even after only one visit and just by standing outside the door.

It was a funny thing, the exterior and the interior was nothing like the White and light, almost sterile environment, he had in the House he shared with chrissie. 

 

Robert could hear feet approaching the door and he smoothed the front of his jacket and stood up straight.

The door opened.

 

Her smile warm and vibrant, her grey hair hung lose and framed her face, her eyes smiling.

 

\- "I'm glad you called." Delta greeted and led him through the House.

 

They were in a different room than the one he had been in before.

This looked like a proper living-room.

It had two Big Windows, darkened by heavy, long, Dark green  curtains. It was fælled with antique furnitures, Big ceramic pots, with Big plants.

there was a sofa, same green As the curtains, two chairs and in the middel was a coffee table. The coffee table was made of Wood, with intricate carvings of trees, flowers and animals.

 

They sat down around the coffee table, across from eachother.

\- "You took your time." Delta said, offering him a cup of tea, whih he politely declined.

\- " What do you mean?"

\- "I'm glad that you called, I just hoped that you would have done so sooner. It's been a while."

\- "I found out how to deal, you didn't really give me anything when we wee here." Robert's tone was  cold, it was his bussiness voice, his professionel front, one he had perfected by now.

\- "patience is a virtue." She smiled and took a sip of her tea.

\- "Look Robert.. what you have is special, I could sense that right away and I hoped you would have called that same day. We have alot to talk about."

\- "Delta, I don't are if it's special, there are other people with some sort of bond out there, you had one. so, I'm not the only one, I'm not that special.. I don't want it, I'm married."

Delta put down her cup of tea and looked directly at Robert, her eyes intense.

\- "True, other people has Bonds aswell, but not many have what you have, 'the bond of two'.

\- "Romantic you huh." Robert said, noticing once again, that she alled it 'the bond of two'.

\- "Yes." She said, smiling.

\- "And I stand by it."

\- "How have you 'managed' it so far, have you been sick?"

Robert shifted a little in his seat, his proffessional front still there.

\- "I did get a little ill, but not for long... I found a way."

Robert looked at Delta, she waited for him to continue.

\- "Headahes, almost migrane like. I started telling Chrissie about what I felt from the other person."

Robert decided that Delta didn't needed to know how much, or rather how little he told Chrissie. It was enough so that he wouldn't get sick.

\- "That's good. Have you felt much from the other person?"

\- "No, not really, nothing special."

Delta reached over the offee table and put her hands in top of Robert's.

 

\- "Why are you here?" Her voice so sweet and caring.

Robert removed his hands gently from underneath Delta's and sat back in the chair.

\- "I... It wasn't like I meant for it to happen, I have no idea what is was... I was just so tired... I had no real control over anything."

\- "What happened?" Delta wasn't sure were this was going.

\- "It was like I was dreaming... But it felt so real."

Delta waited for Robert to continue, she was focused on every word Robert said.

\- "It's hard to explain but I.. I felt safe and free... There was something reminding me of a sunrise.. At the start there was this smell, in some way it was familiar... Then I was in this strange room, but again, there was something recognizeble about it.."

Robert looked at Delta. his proffesional faade had gone, not completely, but close to.

Delta nodded for him to ontinue.

\- "I couldn't see much.. It was in a blur... Then I was able to stop it."

\- "You stopped it? Why?!" Delta's fast response came as a surprise for Robert and herself.

He contiued and ignored the power of her outburst.

\- "I didn't know what it was, I stil don't. It was like I could her his voice."

\- "What did he say?"

Robert let out a little laugh.

\- "Same as me: No."

Delta smiled, it was a smile that contained so many things. The smile didn't reach her eyes, her eyes told a story of sadness.

 

\- "So you both did it." Delta said quietly.

Robert looked up, confused.

\- "What do you mean?"

Delta put her cup of tea down. She had held it tightly in her hands while Robert had talked.

\- "Sounds to me, that you searched for him."

\- "What?! No, bo I didn't."

Delta gave a smile.

\- "You weren't the only one apparently."

Robert shook his head in disbelief.

\- "No, can't be.. I didn't want to, I didn't try to."  
\- "I know, I believe you.. Like I told you, this bond that you, this complete bond, if you like, it can't be controlled.."

\- "Delta picked up her up again, she didn't move it to her lips, she just held in in between her hands.

\- "Could you see where you were? Did you see him?"

\- "No, couldn't see where I was and no I didn't see... the other person either."

\- "You still don't want to meet h..."  
\- "Nothing's changed... How can I prevent it from happening again?"

  
Delta took a deep intake of air.

\- "You said you were tired... The make sure you're well rested. Some people are more vulnerable when they are tired and because the bond is a natural thing, it will try and do what it's supposed to do from the beginning, unite two people."

 

Robert shifted in the chair and Delta looked more intense in his eyes.

\- "You spend a lot of time denying the bond and when you have a moment when your walls are down, it will come out full force."

Robert looked down at the floor.

\- "So I have to live with it as it os now... being tied with someone I don't want to be with, while being married.." It wasn't a question, more of a statement.

 

There was a pause in their conversation. Both of them sat thinking, and both being fine with no words being said.

 

\- "I know that this is not how it's suppoed to go, when someone has a bond... but please Delta, I can't.."

\- "Okay, I'll help you.. but you have to be completely open with me, and we have to meet up regulary. your bond is strong."

\- "Okay, we'll meet, when I have time, I do run a bussiness." Robert's proffessional front was back.

\- "Have you met other with, this complete bond? it's just that you keep saing that this is special... and I know what I have is rare, so is it why you keep saying it?"

\- "You make it sound like you have a decease, it's not, it's the most natural thing out there... And yes, I have met one couple before, with 'the bond of two', my grandparents." Delta almost glowed with happiness when she said the last part.

\- "It was a speacial thing to watch, being around two people who loved eachother so much. They lived in deferent countries back then, but when they both felt the bond, they went searching for eachother right away. The bond never stops you know."

Robert caught himself smiling while Delta told him about her grandparents, but he quickly got rid of the smile.

\- "What they had was special, and they knew another couple with 'the bond of two' and what they felt and went through was exactly the same, it was different than people with the other form for bonds... and that's why I can see that what you have is special, even more than the bond my grandparents had.. It's like your connection is more intense, you feel much more, both of the physical and emotional."

Robert didn't know what to say about that. He never heard of anyone denying the bond, only himself, and he had a feeling that the other person, was doing the same thing as him.

 

\- "I will help you, eventhough I don't like what you are doing. I will help you to cope and live with it. when can we meet again?"

\- "Thank you.. uhm, in two weeks I have bussiness meetings here in London, we can find a day during that, I'll call you when I know more."

\- "okay, good, I...."

Robert frowned, he felt something, and not his own feelings.

\- "Robert? are you okay? is it him?"

\- "Yes, I'm fine.... Yes, it's him... he's sad."

Delta moved over to Robert and put her hands on his shoulders.

\- "It feels like a, I don't know, a goodbye kind of sadness."

Delta knelt down and hugged Robert, the hug came as a surprise for him, but he hugged her back and she whispered in his ear.

\- "Not everyone would have been able to feel that.. not even my grandparents."

 

 

 

 


	9. Aaron and France

When Aaron left for France, his plan was to have as little contact with the People back in the village, As possible.

He had had to promise his mum to keep her updated on life in generel and Ed.

Aaron had to admit that he wasn't the Best at keeping that promise.

 

Paddy and him had made a deal, that they would be in regular contact, either with a phonecall or Skype, so that Aaron had Someone to talk to about the Bond.

Paddy also wanted to make sure he Saw Aaron, heard his voice, because he know that he would miss The Young man very much.

If Aaron Somehow couldn't reach Paddy, the deal was, that he would leave a message, a voicemail, telling Paddy What he was feeling from the other person.

Paddy had stressed enough times, that during his hours of research, that he found out that if People with a Bond didn't talk about it, ignored it or similar, they could get very sick, and Paddy didn't want that for Aaron.

That was their deal and Aaron kept up with it, most of the times.

 

Aaron hadn't told Ed about him having a Bond with Someone and he wasn't going to.

Ed was a romantic and him knowing, that Aaron, his boyfriend, was one of the few with a Bond, one out of millions with a complete Bond, would ruin things for Them.

...

After a month in France Aaron tried to Call Paddy, But he didn't answer. 

The next Day he could see that Paddy had called a couple of times, so Aaron called him back, No answer.

Instead Aaron decided to record a video for Paddy.

...

Paddy opened his e-mail and Saw a video had been sent to him, When he realised that it was from Aaron, he hit play right away.

 

_'Hi Paddy... Told you I would keep my end of our deal.'_

Paddy couldn't help But notice, that Aaron seemed nervous.

_'Okay, I don't want you to mention This, What I am about to tell you.. ever.'_

Aaron fumbled a little with the camera and it filmes the floor. Paddy guessed that Aaron, and the camera was going in to a different room og the appartment.

The camera was being positioned and Paddy could see that Aaron had moved to the bedroom. Aaron was sitting on the bed, back leaned Again the headboard.

_'So, the whole Adam situation wasn't the only reason why I decided to leave.'_

Paddy frowned and wondered What else it could be. Hoping that Aaron hadn't Got himself in to even more trouble before leaving.

_'Uhm.. one Night, after work, I was really tired and couldn't... I was so tired and I had No control over anything.'_

Aaron let out a breath.

Paddy knew that Aaron hated talking with him about the Bond, the other persons feelings and his own feelings aswell. Paddy knew that Aaron didn't feel comfortable infront of a Camera either.

_'Anyways..'_

Paddy watched Aaron closely, he could tell that he found This difficult.

_'It was like a Dream But I Think it was Real.'_

Aaron looked directly in to the camera.

_'I Think I contacted him..'_

Paddy gasped and looked at the screen Again, Aaron's head wasn't turned to the Camera anymore, he was looking Down.

_'Or we contacted eachother... I don't know.. I heard his voice, I Think.'_

 

Aaron let out a breath. His eyes still looking Down.

_'It hasn't happened Again, I hope it won't. I didn't do it on purpose... But I ... I had to get away, I know it Sounds stupid, because, I can't really get rid of him Can I?'_

The question wasn't for Paddy, the question was something that Aaron already know the answer to.

_'I know it won't make sense to you... But it does to me...'_

Aaron looked to his right and Paddy could hear a door slam.

_'I'm here, with Ed, I don't need This other person.'_

Aaron shifted on the bed and Paddy could hear Ed.

_'Aaron, you here?'_

_'yeah, bedroom, give me second.'_

_'Nice one.'_

Aaron looked at the Camera and Paddy could see, the rare thing that was a smile, on Aaron's face as he muttered:

_'Idiot.'_

Paddy smiled back at the screen.

_'I have to go, bye Patrick.'_

And the video ended.

...

 

Aaron didn't feel much from the other person. 

There had been something, that might had felt like a Black eye, But No bruises from it.

He felt anger, hurt and the familiar feeling of being lost.

 

After maybe two years in France, anger, spite, and sometimes greed and vengefullness bacame more and more frequent.

 

At some point it Got too much for him.

He was used to feeling anger, But it was atmosfæren always directed at himself. The anger he Got from the other person, was directed at others. 

Aaron didn't like it and Then he had had enough. He Then started to ignore it, push it away, block it out.

 

Paddy had called him, Aaron didn't answer it, he felt too sick and weak. He had told Ed that it was the flu.

His head felt like it could explode at any minute.

 

On Day five, with Aaron having migrane like headaches that never stopped, he finally decided to give in to Paddy and answer his Call.

 

Paddy Skyped him and Aaron took the Call, Well knowing that he looked like death.

\- "Finally! I've been... oh god, are you okay?" Paddy's face was full of worry.

\- "Just the flu... so What do you want?"

Paddy notes that the room Aaron was in was Dark, he looked pale and not Well at all.

\- "Aaron..."

\- "Headache, okay.. that's all."

\- "I know you are lying kid... we haven't talked in, god knows have long It's been.. and I haven't heard from you at all.. no messeges, No videos, nothing.. and I Can tell that I am right, it has been Way too long since you talked about it, am I right?"

Paddy sounded angry, Aaron knew that he wasn't, But that Paddy was worried.

\- "It's too much sometimes Paddy... he feels things that... things that I don't, and It's not good things.."

\- "Then talk to me, let me help. You can't go on like This. It's making you ill Aaron."

\- "I know, I know that I shouldn't ignore it, or whatever, .. But I can't stop thinking that... why, why would I want to be with someone Who... Money, Paddy, money is What's important. I get This feeling that money is the most important thing in the World for This person." 

 


	10. Aaron, gunshot

Aaron had been back in Emmerdale for months.

He had been lucky that Cain had given him his job back at the garage.

 

Paddy had made a habit of pestering him with question and turning up out of nowhere to talk, or just stare at him.

Aaron would feign annoyance, But he did appreciate What Paddy was doing. Aaron knew how ill he could get if he ignored the Bond. 

 

He'd gotten in to a good rutine with everything and he hadn't felt much from the other person.

It was the same As When he were in France.

 

Then one Day that changed.

 

The days leading up to it, Aaron had felt angry and aggitated. There were two feelings he, still, wasn't quite used to: vengefullness and greed.

The cars he'd been working on, had gotten a treatment that was more rough than usual.

He knew from his experiences in France, that the other persons feelings could and would, sometimes get mixed in with his own. 

He would feel Them so intensely, that he had to get Them out of his system somehow.

 

Once or twice he had had the feeling of a blackeye, When he was in France. 

When he had arrived back home, he did get an actual Black eye and he tried to convince his mom, that he wasn't in trouble and he'd just woke up and it was there, which was the truth. She didn't believe him.

 

Aaron was on his Way to the garage and Paddy called his name.

Aaron tried to ignore it But That didn't stop Paddy, Who Then gestured for Aaron to come over to him.

 

They were standing outside of Paddy and Rhona's House.

\- "Alright lad?"

\- "What do you want?" Aaron Said annoyed, not wanting to be late for work.

 

Cain came walking past Them and shouted:

\- "Oi lad! Not paying you to talk!"

Aaron rolled his eyes and started to Wall away from Paddy, Cain was still in sight.

After only taking a couple of steps, Aaron felt a Cold shiver running through him, fear.

Aaron couldn't move.

 

\- "Come on!" Cain shouted impatiently.

 

Aaron tried to take another step, Then he felt a pain he'd never felt before.

Aaron put a hand on his chest and groaned in pain.

He felt Paddy's hand on his shoulder and he fell to his knees. He couldn't breath and the pain, the Strange presssure on his chest, was too much for him, he felt dizzy.

Paddy was kneeling in front of Aaron, his hands lifted Aaron's up gently.

\- "Look at me Aaron, look at me."

 

Cain was running towards Them, he was worried and confused about What happened o his Nephew.

\- "What's going on?! Aaron you allright?"

\- "We need to get him inside.... now Cain."

Cain frosnes and looked angry at Paddy, not used to being bossed around, especially not by the local vet.

Cain put an arm underneath Aaron's arm and Paddy did the same on the other side.

They were almost inside When Aaron Said:

\- "I Think I, he Got shot."

Cain stopped briefly at Aaron's words But Said nothing and they Got Aaron inside the  House.

 

when they finally Got in the House they sat Aaron Down on the sofa.

\- "What's going on?"

\- "Nothing." Aaron Said weakly, his eyes begging with Paddy not to say anything.

\- "Tell me What' going on!"

Cain was angry and had stepped right infront of Paddy, only inches apart.

\- "You better start ta..."

\- "I can't breath.... I feel so tired."

Paddy stepped around Cain and sat Down next to Aaron.

\- "Look at me, focuse on me."

Aaron wanted to lift his head, But he couldn't, every strength he normally had, was slowly draining out of him.

He wanted to close his eyes.

\- "Aaron talk to  me, look at me."

He gathered everything he had left, lifted his head and loooked Paddy in the eye.

\- "Oh god Aaron, is he..."

\- "No, no I don't Think so.. not get anyways.. It hurts Paddy." 

Aaron put a hand on Paddy's arm.

\- "Don't let me Fall asleep."

 

Cain had been in the background, ignored by Aaron and Paddy. First nothing had made sense, But Cain was sure now, he know What was going on.

Cain looked at Aaron, he looked so small and in so much pain.

Cain had heard about it, about some People having some sort of Bond, but he never knew, that it could hurt the other person so much.

Cain's thoughts were interrupted by Aaron, a small and weak whisper.

\- "Hang in  there."

 

...

Robert was in an ambulance, Racing against time to get him to hospital.

Then he heard it and it was all he needed.

_'Hang in there.'_

 

 

 

 

 

 


	11. Robert, blue eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final chapter coming up soon.

Robert had burried himself in work throghout the years. 

He'd build up a reputation and done wonders for the Company.

Robert had been ambitious, driven by money and prestige. Done What had to be done, to get things to go his Way.

He'd been careless.

His carelessness had been the perfect oppotunity for someone to take him Down.

Luckily they hadn't succeeded.

 

Robert had recovered slowly But steady.

The doctors had told him that he had been lucky to be alive. Due to Where the bullet had hit him, he should have died.

 

When he had finally been allowed to go home, he Discovered that Chrissie had hitten all of Lawrence's guns, rifles and so on.

Normally they were showcased throughout the House, something Robert never liked.

Robert never liked guns and also hated Them being a reminder of his father-in-law being er permanent fixture in What should be his and Chrissie's House.

 

 

He had Met with Delta once since he Got shot, Chrissie was with him.

He didn't tell her or Chrissie about the last words he heard before losing consciousness and surdenly not Who had Said Them.

 

 

After being shot, in an act of revenge, others might have loosened up, made changes in the Way they livet their lives, not Robert.

Robert was going to come back ten fold. And so he did.

 

Robert had decided that he didn't need Delta's help and he didn't want to spend money on her money, he could manage it himself.

It was easy. 

He Got anger, hurt and sadness from the other person. Nothing major. It was the same as always. A couple of fights was thrown in to the mix at times aswell, some without bruises and sometimes with. 

He wasn't going to do What he had done before, he wasn't going to Think about why the other person was feeling What he did, or why he was in What felt like a fight, No, he was not going to Care.

 

Robert treated the Bond the same As he did a business function, he didn't want to attend: he gave his attention, just enough, not too little, not too much. He talked detatched, professionel, almost coldy about it.

He did whatever it took to get on with the life he wanted, trying to forget What he knew was the reason why he survived.

 

The controll he was told he couldn't have, with a Bond like his, was now What he thought as being exactly that, his.

Untill it wasn't.

..

 

Chrissie and Lawrence had been invited to a party in London.

Robert didn't want to attend But Chrissie had started an argument and the only Way he could end it, was to agree to come with Them.

She knew What she was doing starting that fight.

 

They had booked two Rooms in a hotel near were the party was being held, so they didn't have to drive back late at Night.

.

They were finally on their Way home.

Robert was driving, Chrissie was next to him and Lawrence was in the backseat behind Chrissie.

They hadn't been driving long,When Robert felt Strange. He tried to continue to drive, But he could feel that it wouldn't be a safe option.

 

\- "I need To pull over." Robert's voice was weak and his eyes blinking feverishly, while trying to find a place to stop the car.

\- "Honey What's wrong?" Chrissie asked while turning to look worried at her father.

Lawrence had his eyes focused on Robert through the Rearview Mirror, Robert didn't notice.

 

Robert stopped the car and with Shaky hands he unbuckled his seatbelt and removed his tie, he unbuttoned the top buttons, he felt like he was suffocating.

 

\- "It's him... something's wrong, I can't breath."

Chrissie quickly Got out of the car and managed to get Robert to the passenger Seat.

Lawrence had been quiet, he put a hand on Robert's shoulder, When he was finally in the car and helped him with putting the seatbelt on.

 

\- "Robert talk to me... Robert please!" Her voice laced with Panic and fear.

His throat felt dry and he struggled to keep his eyes open.

 

\- "Delta... Take me to Delta."

 

Chrissie drove As fast As legally possible.

 

.

They were parked outside Delta's House.

Chrissie frantically Got out of the car and knocked on the door in Panic.

 

The door opened and Delta was Met with a distressed Chrissie and a Lawrence Who had Robert's arm over his neck, trying to hold him up.

Robert didn't look good, he was pale, almost Grey. His eyes had been almost ripped of all life.

Delta Got Them inside the House fast.

She led Them to the room Where she and Robert had their first talk alone.

 

Robert is put Down on the sofa, Lawrence and Chrissie were sat on the two chairs and Delta was sitting on the armrest of the sofa.

 

\- "Robert What's happening?" Delta asked, trying to Sound Calm.

\- "Come on, you have to talk!" Chrissie Said loudly, having No idea What she should do.

There was a pause.

Robert was trying to find the right words, his mind cloudy and he couldn't focus on anything.

\- "Something's wrong, so wrong." Robert's breathing was strained, his skin getting more and more pale and damp.

 

\- "I'm tired. Really tired."

Delta put a hand on Robert's check.

\- "Then sleep... Try to talk through it, I know it Will be difficult, But you have to Try... so I Can help."

Robert gives in. Closes his eyes, he Can hear Delta's voice faint in the distance.

\- "Talk Robert."

\- "It's like the first time I came by myself to see you."

Chrissie looks at Delta, Then at her her husband, she didn't know he went alone.

\- "I'm above the Clouds. They arent White This time.. The sky is Grey."

 

...

Robert's Where he's been before, But nothing was Pleasant about This time around. There's an unpleasant ringing in his ears.

The drop from the sky was fast and violent, When he stopped his Body ached.

He looked around.

He's in the middel of a Dark sunset. Nothing was peaceful, nothing was safe about This.

He could smell dust and something burned.

Like the first time, his vision was blurred.

This time he wasn't in the room, he had No idea Where he was.

 

There was a figure out in the distance. Robert could see it moving closer. He Walked towards it.

Without Robert noticing, he was standing face to face with the Blurry figure.

His vision not clear and unfocused.

He closed his eyes and everything went quiet.

 

Robert could feel a hand on the left side of his face. instinctly he leaned in to the touch.

He opened his eyes.

He was Met with two Bright blue eyes, staring right in to his own eyes.

 

...

Robert let out a tired sigh.

\- "It's him."

\- "What!? How?" chrissie and Lawrence Said loudly in unison.

Robert didn't answer Them and the room went quiet Again, until Chrissie interrupted.

\- "What does he want?"

Delta hushed her and gave her a Warning look.

Delta started to speak, her voice much softer than Chrissie's scared tone.

\- "Is he saying anything?"

\- "No."

 

Robert drifted off completely, everything covered in darkness. 

He couldn't hear Delta, Chrissie or Lawrence.

He couldn't see the man with the blue eyes.

His eyelids heavy, he couldn't open Them.

Suddenly Robert managed to choke out some words, But still trapped in the darkness.

 

\- "He's dying."

 

...

Robert could feel the hand on his face Again, slowly the blue eyes reapeared.

Robert put his hand on the right side of the Mans face.

Then the deafening ringing Sound was back, his vision once again blurry, the touch of the hand had dissapeared.

Darkness.

...

\- "Wake me up! Shake me! stop This!"

Lawrence was the first one to react, he shook Robert by his shoulders, while saying:

\- "Come on Robert! We're here."

\- "open your eyes love. Please!" Chrissie cried.

 

Slowly Robert woke up, his face still pale and his skin damp, struggling to breath.

Delta knelt besidde Robert on the sofa. She was about to say something, When all of a sudden, Robert's Body jolted. After a few seconds, it happened Again. This was repeated five times.

 

 


	12. Aaron and Robert (A)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had two endings to this story, and I only intended to post one of them (This one) but I decided to do both.  
> This is the first one.
> 
> I might have messed up the timeline through out this story but I hope it 's okay anyways.

It had been almost a week since his frantic visit to Delta. He still hadn't quite recovered from it. He was tired and his body ached.  
The aching was the onlt feeling he had, it wasn't from the other person, it was the aftermath.  
Otherwise he felt empty.

Robert was sitting with his laptop in front of him, some he stumbled across a recent news headline.  
'Tragedy in small village.'  
Robert clicked on it without thinking.  
'Three people dead.'  
'Helicopter crash.'  
Robert shook his head, the date fit.  
The name of the village wasn't metioned, but he could tell from the few photos where it was.

Robert hadn't heard Chrissie walk in and hadn't notied that she was standing right behind him.  
\- "I heard about that, it's horrible."  
Robert was startled, he turned his head and looked at his wife.  
\- "Three people died.... No names, no photos."  
\- "Oh Robert." Chrissie said, a tint of sadness in her voice. She sat down next to him.  
\- "You think that... You know.. was in the..."  
Robert shut down his laptop.  
\- "Maybe he didn't."  
\- "He did Chrissie." Robert said and walked to the kitchen.

Robert had refused to talk to Chrissie about what had happened. Chrissie had tried her best to get him to talk, she even got Delta to come by.  
He didn't want to talk, he couldn't.

Chrissie followed Robert to the kitchen.  
\- "Did the article say where it was?"  
Robert had his back to Chrissie, he put both of his hands on the kitchen counter and bowed his head.  
\- "No."  
\- "We could find out?"  
Robert let out an irritated sigh.  
\- "Why would we do that? It's over now, it doesn't matter anymore."  
Chrissie walked over to Robert.  
\- "Because, Robert.." Chrissie turned Robert around to face her.  
\- "If we know where, we could go there, it could help."  
\- "I know where it is... We an't go... It's too complicated."  
Chrissie put a hand on Robert's shoulder and looked deeply in his eyes.  
\- "Emmerdale." He said, sounding defeated.  
Chrissie didn't say anything, she knew what Emmerdale was to Robert, so she hugged him tightly instead. Robert hugged her back and then stepped away from her embrace.  
\- "Do you know anyone who still lives there?"  
\- "I don't know, I'm not sure... oh god, my sister, vic."  
\- "Call her."  
\- "Yes, yes I should, what if she's one of the.."  
\- "Hey... call her, be sure she's okay, if she still lives there."  
Robert stood frozen for a moment. Worry written all over his face. 'Whi didn't I think about Victoria?' Robert asked himself, a rush of guilt came over him.  
\- "My phone.. where's my phone?!" He searched his pockets in panic.  
\- "Here, it's right here." Chrissie said, it was rare she saw her husband like that, and she tried to stay calm.

Robert found the number and sat down. Chrissie sat down beside him.  
He pressed call.  
..  
They were almost there, dressed in all black.

When they arrived, they headed directly to the woolpack.  
Diane was the only one there, she looked tired and sad.  
\- "Hi Diane." Robert said, trying to look and sound confident.  
\- "Oh my, Robert!?" Diane walked quickly around the bar and gave her stepson a hug.  
\- "What are you doing here pet?.. Sorry, who are you?" Diane asked and looked between Robert and Chrissie.  
\- "Sorry Diane, uhm, this is Chrissie, my wife."  
\- "How lovely. So nice to meet you. Robert I had no idea that you're married."  
Robert stood still, Chrissie beside him, he didn't know what to say, but it was lear, that Vic hadn't told Diane anything about him coming.  
\- "Well, why don't you two come to the back, people will be coming in soon."

They followed Diane to the back-room.  
-"You make yourselves comfortable, I need to sort some things out first, it'll only take a minute, and then we can catch up" Diane gave them a tired smile and walked out.  
Robert was standing in the middle of the back-room, not sure about what to do with himself. It was strange being back, he never thought he ever would be, he didn't like it. There was too many memories, to many bad ones.  
Chrissie put a hand on his back. They didn't say anything, they just waited for Diane to come back. They knew what she was preparing for.

The door leading to the pub opened, but it wasn't Diane entering. Robert knew it was and put on his best couldn't-care-less front.  
\- "Diane told me you were back." Chas said.  
Chas wasn't alone, a big bald man had followed her in.  
\- "I hoped she was joking." Chas spat out.  
Robert noted that she didn't look as spitefull as she sounded. She was dressed in black, she looked even worse that Diane, red eyes and pale skin.  
Robert took a deep intake of air.  
\- "I, we heard what happened, with the helicopter and wanted to know if Vic was okay.  
\- "Heard of the telephone?" Chas bit back.  
\- "Yes, and I did call her."  
\- "Well then you should've know she's allright, you can leave now."  
The big man stepped in.  
\- "You've come on a bad day, maybe it's for the best if.."  
Chrissie interruped, she knew that if Robert was told he should leave again, he would. Chrissie knew that Robert needed this.  
\- "I'm Chrissie, Robert's wife. We only came to see Victoria and Diane, and give our condolences."  
Paddy stepped closer to Chrissie and reached his hand out.  
\- "I'm Paddy and this is Chas."  
Robert didn't see the handshakes, he didn't hear if words were being spoken. His eyes had caught something on one of the shelves.  
It was a piture, a picture of a man, with bright blue eyes, smiling so lovingly.  
He picked the picture from its place and held it in his hands.  
\- "Oi you! DOn't touch that!" Chas shouted, grabbing the photo from Robert's hands.  
\- "Who's he?"  
Chas didn't answer, she placed the photo bak in its place on the shelf. Paddy was the one to answer Robert's question.  
\- "Aaron, Chas' son."Chas had turned around, she was getting ready to unleash one of her verbal attacks on Robert.  
\- "I'm sorry." Robert said, that caught Chas off guard and her planned attack was forgotten about, for now.  
\- "For what?" She snapped instead.  
They were interrupted by Cain and Diane entering the back-room.  
\- "What's going on?" Cain asked, angry frown on his tired face.  
Chrissie ignored the newcomers and moved closer to Robert and whispered in his ear.  
\- "It's him, isn't it?"

Robert closed his eyes and small waves, memories of sort, of every emotion, everything he's ever felt from the other person, from Aaron, rushed through him.  
\- "You just gonna stand there?!" ain barked.  
\- "Robert maybe you should..." Diane said gently, nodden in the direction of the back door.  
Robert opened his eyes and let out a breath.  
They were arguing amongst themselves now. Robert's name being mentioned frequently, or crude, rude words, whivh Robert knew was him.  
Chrissie tried to calm the room, alongside Diane.  
\- "Six years ago, what happened?"  
The room went quiet, only the muffled sound of chatter from the pub seeped in.  
Chas got right in Robert's face, her tired eyes burned with anger ad grief.  
\- "How do you... Get out! You do't know my son, you know nothing!" Chas shouted, while she poked a finger hard in Robert's chest. Cain stepped closer to Chas, standing beside her, his eyes harsh on Robert.  
Robert tried to keep himself calm and not spit out everything he knew was hushed and secret in this village.  
\- "No, I didn't know him... I .. We should leave." Robert said and looked at Chrissie.  
\- "But.."  
\- "Good, leave! Chas spat out.  
Robert stepped around the angry Dingle sibling, Chrissie was a few steps ahead of him and had reached the door leading to the pub. Diane gave her an apologetic nod.

Robert walked past Paddy.  
\- "You did, didn't you?" Paddy's voice was quiet and unsure.  
Robert turned to face Paddy.  
\- "Know him, I mean."  
\- "What you on about?! Aron would never befriend the likes of him." Cain said and Chas agreed.  
Paddy didn't take notice of anyone else but Robert.  
\- "He loked himself in the garage."  
\- "Shut up Paddy!" Chas was furious and couldn't understand as to why Paddy would tell a seemingly stranger that.  
\- "Enough Paddy." Cain said stern and walked towards the vet, threatening, angry and confused.  
Chas had had enough, this wasn't what she needed right now, and was about to launch herself at Paddy.  
\- "And started the car." Robert finished Paddy's sentence in mumbled words.  
Everyone went quiet, Chas stood with tears in her eyes, confused, eventhough it was years ago, it wasn't a memory she liked to remember.  
Cain had a frown on his face.  
\- "And some months later, what happened?"  
Diane shook her head, baffled and like everyone else in the room, she was confused.  
\- "How..." Chas cut herself off, her voice frail and quiet.  
\- "He was heartbroken, wasn't he?"  
Paddy looked at Chas with an apology in his eyes.  
\- "His boyfriend was in an accident... and then, awhile later, he died... Assisted suicide."  
\- "By Aaron.." Robert said, not a question, but a statement of facts.  
\- "what..." Chas shook her head, she had no idea, what was going on, how Robert could know the things he did.  
Paddy nodded at Robert's words, show him that he was correct.  
\- "That explains the guilt." Robert said quietly and looked at Chrissie, who once again moved to stand by his side.  
\- It had to be flaming Sugden." Cain stated, interrupting the otherwise tense and quiet room.  
\- "What's going on?" Diane asked.  
Robert looked at his stepmom.  
\- "I...I have.. had, a bond with.." Robert tried to explain.  
Chas and Diane gasped in shock, Diane put her hand over her mouth.  
\- "No, you're lying! He would have told me... Paddy?"  
\- "I'm sorry Chas."  
\- "I can't believe this!... and you..." Chas turned to Cain.  
\- "You knew aswell?!"  
\- "I'm sorry sis.."  
\- "Don't! You sure?" Chas asked PAddy.  
Paddy responded by looking at Robert and nodded.  
\- "When.. how long have you known?" Chas asked.  
\- "About six years.. it... it was after Aaron's.. incident.. and he came down from his room and looked really bad.. I thought, it was complications of sort of, you know and that he had come home too soon."  
Robert cut in.  
\- "Yeah, I got a beating that day." Robert looked at Chrissie, who shook her head, remembering, what an idiot he had been.  
\- "Why didn't you tell us?" Diane asked.  
Robert let out a a laugh, a laugh that contained hurt.  
\- "I didn't know who he was.. and when, when should I have told you? It's not like we talk, or that I'm welcomed here.. Even Vic hesitated when she said I could come by."

Chas had sat down on the armrest of the sofa, while the others had talked.  
\- "Wait." She interrupted them, voice far more quiet that it had been since she walked in to the back-room.  
\- "You said you got a beating.. but you also said.. that you felt what he felt?"  
\- "I've.. yes, it's a complete bond." Robert said and sat down on of the the chairs around the small kitchen table.  
Once again, the room was quiet. They all knew that not all people had a bond and they knew that even fewer had a complete bond, they knew it was rare and very powerfull.  
Cain let out a breath and rubbed a hand over his face.  
\- "I didn't know... I thought it was a physical one... Why did it have to be you." Cain said the last part while looking at Robert, anger clear on his face.  
\- "When, when I found out, he said it had felt like he had been shot.." Cain stated with a smirk, trying to gather whatever ammunition he could.  
\- "You got shot?" Diane asked worried.  
\- "Yes." Robert said simply. He felt vulnerable and his walls was up, like they had been ever since he had decided to go to Emmerdale. The walls had been slowly chipped away while he's been here and he didn't like it. He was trying to get them back up.

\- "Why didn't he say, why didn't he tell me?" has said, sorrow lacing every word and every feature on her face.  
\- "He didn't want it." Paddy said and looked at Robert, hoping that he wasn't offended by it.  
\- "It's okay, I didn't want it either. I mean, I had and have Chrissie... I fought it so hard." With the last words, he knew his walls hadn't been re-build as he had intended.  
\- "He did the same?"  
\- " Yes.. he went to france and he ignored it and got sick."  
\- "Same for Robert, he got headaches." Chrissie said and looked sadly at Robert.  
\- "You must be incredible stubborn, the pair of you." Chas said and looked at Robert, no anger or disgust in her voice.  
\- "I mean, you must have been.. to ignore, to not wanting to meet.. With a bond like that, I didn't know it was possible. I thought, I thought it would just happen, like the natural thing it is." has looked down. She wanted to be angry, she wanted to be left alone, but she also wanted to hear more about her son. Things she knew he never told her.  
With her and all the other poeple in Aaron's life, he allways had his guards up, no onw was really allowed in. She knew, that with a bond like that, he wouldn't have been able to hide.  
\- "How was he.. in France?" Chas asked Robert.  
While Aaron had been in France, she didn't talk much with him and Paddy's answers always seemed rehearsed to her, probably from the instrutions of Aaron.  
Robert was taken aback by Chas's question and her tone, she didn't sound angry, she sounded like a concerned mother.  
\- "Okay." robert said and he could see that Chas was hoping for more, she needed more than that. He took a deep breath ad his proffesionel and cold demenor, was not there anymore, not even a hint of it. Robert didn't like it, it seemed wrong in a way, bit seeing a mother covered in so much guilt and sorrow, was too much for Robert, and he knew he had to give.  
\- "I didn't feel much from him when he was there.. You don't have to say when, dates, the years, he was in France."  
All of them looked confused at Robert.  
\- "Then you can't really answer the question." Cain snapped.  
Robert looked at Chas and sat on the edge of his chair, elbows on knees.  
\- "I know when he left. I was with a specalist." Robert looked at Chrissie, he knew that Chrissie didn't know about that session with Delta.  
\- "She knows alot about the bonds and helped me to try and deal with it, she didn't like that idea... she called it, going against nature..." He smiled a little at the last part and he contiued.  
\- "Then during our session, I felt overcome with sadness.. and love. It felt like a goodbye." Robert stopped and looked over at Chas, more intensely than he did when he had talked. her breathing was slow, but shallow.  
\- "It was.. A goodbye he didn't really wanted." Robert said, still looking at Chas, who now had tears threatening to run down her cheeks.  
They were all sat there in amazement, even Chrissie, who had known about the bond since the beginning, was thinking about how a bond could be so strong, between two people who didn't knew eachother and never met, that he was able to feel that, small details, like the differences in goodbyes.

\- "The picture.." Diane said, looking at the photo of a smiling Aaron and then she looked at Robert as she continued.  
\- "Did you know it was him?"  
\- "Yes."  
\- "How?" Cain asked, he was leaning against the door leading through the back entrance.  
Paddy had moved to sit next to Chas on the sofa. Diane was sitting on a chair on the opposite side of the table across from Robbert. Chrissie was leaning against the kitchen counter, the perfect place to the everyone in the room.  
Robert cleared his throat. This was uncomfortable, he still didn't like talking about it. Only Delta knew almost every detail about his bond, that was before he had decided to cut all ties to her and deal with what was going on his own. A decision he regretted now.  
\- "I uhm, I heard him first... I was tired after a hard day at work and then I fell asleep, it was like a dream, but it felt so real."  
All eyes was on Robert, listening intensely.  
Robert looked at Diane.  
\- "I was here."  
\- "What?" Diane said alittle too loud, which caught herself by suprise.  
\- "I was.. I was in the midde of a.. sunrise. And I caught a scent of something that I couldn't really place, but I knew it from somewhere." Robert fought to keep his voice calm and for his words to make sense.  
\- "Then I was in a room, a room with this wallpaper." He said pointing at the walls.  
\- "All of is got too much, I didn't know what was happening.. so I said no, well I yelled no, and so did he, I heard his voice."  
Diane had tears in her eyes, even Cain's eyes were red. Chas was fighting her tears back.  
\- "What about when you saw him?" Paddy asked. Robert looked at him, then at Chas, he knew that he would be asked that question, but it didn't mean that he was prepared or ready to answer it. He knew why he had seen Aaron.  
\- "I can't."  
\- "Robert." Chrissie said, her voice gentle and soft. He couldn't say it, he couldn't look at them, the sadness, the sorrow in the room became claustrophobic.  
\- "We should leave." Robert stood up from the chair, not daring to look at anyone, hoping that Chrissie wouldn't say anymore and follow him out.  
\- "Tell me!" Chas had moved just as fast as Robert, her hand tightly grabbing around his upper arm.  
\- "Tell mee!" She shouted again, Robert's eyes was focused on the floor, he shook his head.  
\- "Darling please. What's going on?" Chrissie said, not so gentle and soft this time.  
There was shouting around him, Chas's hand still wrapped around his arm, the suffocating saddness that had swallowed the room, had been replaced by chaos.  
Robert couldn't stand it anylonger.

\- "His eyes!"  
The chaos of the room came to an abrupt end.  
\- "The first thing I felt in the dream, that wasn't a dream, was his hand on my face." Robert stopped and looked at the hand around his arm, and then he looked Chas in the eyes.  
\- "His eyes.. They were the first thing I saw."  
Chas let go of his arm.  
\- "They were so bright... They shouldn't have been that bright.." Robert's voice was on the verge of trembling, he was fighting it, he was fighting the memories of everything he had felt when he had first looked in to those bright blue eyes, fighting what he had felt when he had realised.  
\- "Why?" Chas asked in almost a whisper, her eyes glossy.  
Robert still held Chas' eyes with his.  
\- "He was dying."  
Gasps and a quiet sob filled the room.  
\- ".. And he knew it."  
Tears ran freely from Chas' face.  
\- "He helped people, didn't he? when the helicopter crashed."  
Paddy wiped his eyes and was readying himself to answer Robert.  
\- "Yes." Chas replied instead.  
\- "He ran in and hepled people out." Diane was the one to explain further.  
\- "How did you know?"  
\- "I wasn't sure at first... but I got that sensation of that complete selfless feeling, I have never experienced before..."  
Chas took a deep breath.  
Chrssie walked over to Robert, put a hand on his shoulder and whispered in his ear.  
\- "It's okay, you can say everything you want." She understood now that his bond was more powerful and had affected him more than she thought. She understood now that he had fought against it and had done so with every fiber in his being, to not give in.  
Robert turned his head to look his wife in the eyes and then quickly removed his eyes from hers.

He didn't want to say anymore, he didn't want to share what was on his mind.  
He had spend so much time trying not to dwell on the emotions he got from the other man, the pain, both emotional and physical, he didn't know how to put it in to words, he didn't know how to admit his own feelings.

\- "I din't like you." Chas said, interrupting Roberts thoughts.  
\- "But... I think you need to come with me.."  
Robert looked confused at her, so did evryone else.  
\- "Everyone is in the pub now, so we'll go through the back."  
\- "Sis.."  
\- "No... I need this too."  
They looked at her and they knew where she was taking him.  
Chrssie took at step forward, Diane stopped her and said qietly:  
\- "It's okay.. They should go alone to.."  
Chrissie nodded, she understood now where they were going.

..  
Chas and Robert walked in silent. Their feet heavy on the ground and the tempo slowed down the closer they got to their destination.  
Before they could enter, they heard a voice.  
\- "Vic told be you were back." Andy's voice came from behind them.  
\- "I'm not back.. Just a visit." Robert simply replied.  
Chas stood still, annoyed by Andy interrupting them, but she didn't want to get in the middle of the brothers.  
\- "Katie and I.."  
\- "I don't care... This is not about you.. You are not that important." Robert said looking at Andy, he didn't see the look Chas gave him, it wasn't anger.  
\- "Typical.. you don't even have time to your own brother." Andy said angrily.  
Robert huffed, anger was finding its way to him aswell.  
\- "We're not brothers, you've said it many time before. so don't give me that.. you can leave now."  
Andy looked between Chas and Robert.  
\- "What are you doing here?" He asked.  
Chas could feel a lump in her throat.  
\- "We're here to see Aaron." She answered, eyes filling up with tears.  
\- "Oh.. I'm sorry Chas.. but why's he here, with you?"  
\- "Like I said, you're not the important one." Robert looked at Chas and then at Andy.  
Andy looked confused at both of them.  
\- "You can't trust him Chas. Whatever's going on here.."  
\- "I know, I don't.. but please Andy, just.. go, leave us to it."

Andy shook his head and looked to his right, then he nodded.

 

The shot could be heard in the whole village, the screams that followed travelled further than the sound of the gun.

Robert fell to the ground, he could hear Chas's desperate cry for help, he could feel her holding him.  
Then the noice of Chas and the feeling of the hard ground beneath him dissapeared.  
.  
He was standing in a thick fog, everything white and grey.  
He felt a hand on his shoulder and he turned around.  
\- "It's too soon for you."  
\- "So was it for you."  
They let out a breath and Robert closed his eyes thinking 'this is it, this is how I'm going to die.' His thought were interrupted by the feeling of soft lips on his own.  
He opened his eyes and rested his forehead on Aaron's. Their lips met again. Aaron stepped back.  
\- "I'm sorry.. but this isn't your time." A tear fell down Aaron's cheek and he reached to Robert's face.  
\- "Try not to get shot anymore."  
\- "I don't want to leave.." Robert's voice trembled.  
\- "I know.. Close your eyes."  
Robert did and Aaron's lips was back on his, Robert deepened the kiss.  
Then the feeling of Aaron's soft lips were gone and the fog lifted. Once again he felt empty, lost and scared.  
He could hear sirens.


	13. Aaron and Robert (B)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Sorry for killing Aaron in ending A. 
> 
> Due to earlier comments about, them meeting, I felt guilty about already knowing I would kill Aaron, and that It was pretty much the first chapter I wrote.. so I wrote another ending :).
> 
> I would like to know which one you prefered.   
> (Angst comes naturally to me, I'm practising in writing more happy stuff)
> 
>  
> 
> .

The events of that day and the days that followed, proved to be too much for Chrissie and Robert's marriage.  
Six months after that day, it was well and truly over.

Robert made sure, that he got what he thought he deserved and was owed, from Chrissie, the company and Lawrence.  
To get it, he played the cold, calculating, snide, businessman and it payed off.  
The satisfaction was there but something had changed.  
That day had changed him, he denied it at first, he fought it.

After his divorce was finalised, he booked regular sessions with Delta, who didn't hide how happy she was about his decision to do so.  
Over time, their relationship changed.  
They became friend, good friends and they reached a point were she no longer wanted to be payed.  
They enjoyed and benefited equally from their friendship.  
They talked about everything, they walked long walks together.  
Sometimes, quite often, the subject of conversation changed to Robert's unique bond. 

Delta had opened up to Robert, about her being scared, when he had showed up that day, she had never seen a bond have that kind of affect, never seen it so powerfull. Delta told him that she felt like she was drowning, because she didn't know exactly what to do, she also told him that, she had feared for his life.  
Robert could understand why she felt like that, he himself was scared that day. He didn't tell her that, but she knew.  
When the conversation turned to the bond he didn't say much, he couldn't, there wasn't anything to tell.  
At first he didn't think much of it, he didn't want to think about why he felt nothing from the other person.

As time went by, he did think about, alot.  
He didn't like it, he didn't like feeling nothing from the other person.   
Sure he had gotten alot of negative feelings from the other person, alot of physical pain aswell, but he was more than that, Robert could see that now.  
Somehow during the years with the bond he had gotten used to, it in a way.

That day, that dream, which wasn't a dream, was played in his mind over and over.  
The blue eyes locked with his own.  
Those blue eyes told him more than he could have ever imagined.  
The kindness, the love, self-sacrifice, loyalty, that were in those eyes, was like nothing he had ever felt and experienced before.  
Before that, he would never have thought that one person could contain all of those things.

Robert was aware of his own progress, his own personal journey and growth, since that day, but he was far from being like the other person. He couls still be his old self, when needed.

...  
Delta had talked him into picking her up at the mail-office, with the promise of a home-cooked meal in the evening.

Robert was seeting the table and he turned around to look at Delta.  
\- "Robert?"  
\- "I'm dizzy."  
Delta rushed to Robert's side.  
\- "Sit, sit down."  
Delta guided him to sit on one of the dining room chairs.  
Robert put his head between his knees and Delta rubbed circles on his back.  
\- "Is it you... or from him?" Delta said quietly, she knew that Robert hadn't felt anything from the other man, neither physical or emotional.  
.  
Both of them had wondered if the bond had been broken in the most cruel way possible.  
They had talked about it. Delta told Robert about how she had felt when she lost her bond, her Rose. Robert told her about what he was feeling, or lack thereof. Plenty of evenings had been spend with comparing notes, the nothes, didn't compare and both where at loss about what was happening with Robert's complete bond.  
.  
\- "Him... It's him Delta."  
Eventhough Robert was dizzy and feeling nauseous, he was relieved, he was relieved to feel something, anything at all.

Robert was slowly getting colour back in is face and the dizziness and nausea, had almost dissapeared.  
\- "You could still try and find him? I mean you're not married anymore... And you kind of know how to search for him."  
Robert looked at Delta with a smirk.  
\- "You mean, that you are curious as to what's going on and why you can't seem to find anything that matches with what's happening to me?"  
\- "No!... okay, maybe, a little." She laughed and looked to Robert with her grey smiling eyes.  
\- "No, I can't.. Maybe for some reason, things has changed and I might not even be able to find him."  
Robert let out a sigh.  
\- "But, me feeling like shit, that has to be a good sign, right?" Robert said, not sounding too convinced.  
\- "Yeah." Delta said, small glint of sadness in her eyes, and she put a reassuring hand on Robert's knee.  
\- "I think.. I think that you weren't ready before.. you are now."  
They sat in silence, food forgotten about.  
...  
Once again, Delta had roped him into something, this time it was carrying bags of fresh fruits, vegetables, or other things that would cath Delta's eyes.  
They were at a large market, there was stand with, fresh fruits, vegestables, meat, live animals and a little further away were cars, old cars, some collectebles and Robert would rather be over there, instead of being surrounded by chickens and carrots.

Robert had finally, successfully, guilt tripped Delta onto letting him decide where to go next and they made their way to the area where the cars were.

As they got closer to the area, Robert felt more and more strange.  
Robert had tried to keep the conversation with Delta going, but it got too much.

Robert suddenly stopped walking.

\- "Robert you okay?"  
Robert didn't answer her, he had to sit down. He spotted some boxes on the side of the gravel path, that they were on and went over to them and sat down on one of them.  
\- "Talk to me Robert... Is it him?" Delta's voice was hopefull yet worried.  
\- "He's here." Robert said, overwhelmed and surprised.  
\- "Oh my. Where? Are you sure?" Delta looked around behind Robert, eventhough she had no idea how Robert's bond looked like.  
\- "I don't know where, but he's here, I'm sure of that."

Robert could feel his heart beat faster than normal and a strange sensation in his stomach.  
He tried to get back up on his feet, he didn't know why, but he had to get up, go somewhere.  
\- "Robert stop, sit down." Delta said in a stern manner.  
Robert tried to take a couple of steps forwards but he couldn't, he grabbed Delta's arm to keep himself from falling on the hard ground.  
Delta guided him back to the box he was previously sat on. She knelt down infront of him and took his face in her hands.  
Robert's eyes were unfocused and Delta knew, he wouldn't be able to focus on her or hear her clearly. Robert was somewhere else.  
.  
Robert knew that his eyes were open, but what he saw didn't match to where he knew he was.  
He was surrounded by a thick fog, there was noice all round him.  
The noice became clearer and turned to music and chatter.  
The fog lifted a little but didn't go away.  
It was like he was walking in slowmotion.  
Robert walked inbetween rows of chairs.  
It all felt very similar.   
He knew where he was. A wedding.  
Andy'd wedding.  
Robert shook his head, confused he tried to stop his path leading in between the chairs, he couldn't.  
His feet contiued their pre-destined path.  
Robert turned his head, while he was still walking in slowmotion. Everything was happening so slow.

A young boy was sitting playing with a gameboy. Robert wanted to turn his head, but it wasn't to be.  
The young boy looked up, briefly, in real time it must have been maybe only for the briefest of seconds, their eyes met.

Robert was catapulted away from the wedding and out of the fog.  
.  
He was back at the market with Delta.  
\- "Hi." Her gentle voice whispered.  
\- "Are you back with me?" She had a hand on his knee.  
Robert looked around, embaressed.  
\- "Don't worry, you only sat and stared out in the air." Delta said, she had gotten to know Robert very well, and knew he hated looking like a fool.  
\- "I've met."  
\- "I know, when you accidentally searched you saw..."  
\- "No, I mean, I've met him before that... A wedding, briefly... it's years ago."  
Robert looked up, trying to catch her eyes, pleading with her to say something.  
She didn't, she remained in silence, in her own thoughts. Trying to piece together everything she's ever learned about the different bonds, about Robert's bond.  
\- "Say something!" Robert said louder than he had intended, causing some by-passers to look in their direction.  
\- "Where?"  
\- "Where what?"  
\- "The flashback, where did it take place?"  
\- "Uhm, the village I'm from." Robert said, looking down on the ground.  
\- "That could explain it.. It does, it explains alot!" Her voice full of life and eagerness.  
\- "I'm not following." Robert said, looking up at Delta, who was now on her feet.  
\- "How old were you? How old was he?" Delta was pacing infront of him.  
Robert gave her a confused look, a look that told her, she needed to explain further.  
\- "Were the both of you under the age of 18 or just one of you ?"

It clicked now, even if it was just a tiny bit.  
.  
People with a bond were born with it.  
The nature of the bond was predestined before birth.  
Before the age of 18, the bond would linger, wait at the surface. The bond was always there.  
At the age of 18, the bond would break through, break free and its natural power would begin to work.  
It would start to search, to connect immidiatly and the bond would always find eachother within seonds of turning 18.  
.  
It didn't start six years ago. It had started long before then.

Delta looked at Robert, she sat down on the box next to him, shoulder against shoulder, she turned her head, her eyes shining.  
\- "they already met, you already met."   
\- "I don't understand.."  
\- "You bonds, they already made contact, that's why, it has to be the reason why your bond is so strong and powerfull.. A complete bond only makes it so much more. You alredy met, seen eachother, but your bonds weren't ready then."  
Delta looked at Robert, she knew that he was tired now, and decided to distract him a little, relax him as much as she could in this situation.  
\- "I told you that I lived next to my bond, that I didn't have to search for her, and that's true. I accidentally moved in the appartment next to her when I was 23 and we never seen eachother before that day, but when we looked in to eachothers eye, we knew." Delta smiled, bright and joyous like she always did when she talked about Rose.  
\- "Our bond never reacted the way yours did, and do.... your bond, you, already had a glimpse of your soulmate. Already made a connection with the one."  
Robert let out a breath, almost a sigh.  
\- "You saying the bond, or bonds, were homesick?" He said with a confused frown on his face.  
Delta smiled and put a hand on Robert's back.  
\- "You're from the same village, you made that connection, you probably have heard eachothers names around the village.. and well, you weren't both 18, so the bonds had to wait.. I would say that when both of you turned the right age, 'The bond of two' they were desperate." Delta eyes was still shining.  
Robert wanted to call her a naive romantic but he couldn't get the words out.  
\- "I don't know his name, maybe I've heard it around the village, but I don't know.. he's younger than me."  
Delta Raised her eyebrows and gave him a rokked smile. Robert nudge her in the side with his elbow, and they both laughed a little.  
Delta stood up and was going to say to Robert that they should go to a place with shadow, so they could talk a bit more. Delta felt a arm grabbing her hand in a weak attempt to make her stop and turn around.

Robert's mouth felt dry, his heart had started to race again, a dizzyness washed over him, he shook his head in an attempt to shake it off.  
\- "Hey, it's okay..we've been out in the sun all day..Let me get you some water."   
Robert, looked up, his lips dry, he nodded.  
He put his head down again.  
It wasn't the usual dizziness, he felt like he was flying and falling at the same time. It felt like he had had the wind knocked out of him, but not in a violent way.

Delta got to her feet and took a couple of steps back, still looing at Robert.  
She turned around and took a couple of more steps, then she stopped, her eyes wide, mouth open in slight disbelief.   
The scene in front of her, only about 30 metres away from her and Robert, looked very familiar, is was one she had just stepped away from. For a couple of seconds, she forgot to breath.  
Delta turned around towards Robert.

Robert had sensed, that Delta hadn't moved any further, so he looked up. He saw the look on her face, a look he couldn't decipher.  
Delta didn't say anything, she only stepped to the side, in doing so, she revealed to Robert, what had made her stop.

Robert saw a big, bald man on his knees, on the ground.  
Infront of him was a younger man.  
Robert felt a gust of wind swirling around him, it felt safe.  
The younger man looked up. The he was on his feet, walking towards Robert.  
Robert did the same, it was like the gush of wind, was gently pushing him in the younger mans direction.  
It didn't feel like he was falling anymore, he was soaring.  
..  
Aron remembered those eyes vividly.  
As he stood up and began to walk, he could hear Paddy's voice in the background, but he ouldn't hear the words, Aaron's aatention was somewhere else.  
The swirling wind drowned out Paddy's words and was gently pushing him in the other mans direction.  
..  
They were standing right infront of eachother.  
Paddy by Aaron's side.  
Delta by Ronert's.  
Neither men had noticed.

Robert let out a breath he had unknowingly been holding and he closed his eyes to compose himself.  
Robert felt a touch of a hand on the left side of his face and he opened his eyes and he saw those blue eyes, and this time it wasn't in a dream.  
\- "I was in a coma... But you were right in front of me the whole time."  
Robert smiled.  
Everything had pieced itself together, standing infront of eachother, everything made sense, and every little detail from before the bond broke though was remembered.  
\- "Hi Aaron." Robert said.  
\- "Hi Robert."


End file.
